Typically, Scannerland entries come directly from the source — my scanner. Today, however, I have a fun little item that didn’t come from the scanner, but I think it’s worth sharing.
An Athens man woke up Wednesday night after a drinking binge with his ex-girlfriend to find a 6-inch crochet needle jammed in his urethra. The Decatur Daily and The Athens News-Courier reported the story, but you can also read it on The Huntsville Times Web site.
He says he didn’t wake up when it happened, but instead woke up a few hours later and saw the blood in his lap. My first question: How do you sleep through that?! Also, he claims he doesn’t know his ex-girlfriend’s last name. Something is fishy here … but still, I’m sure this man didn’t put it there himself. After all, have you ever seen a 6-inch crochet needle?
SCANNERLAND BONUS: Where’s Waldo the Robber? This would-be criminal either chickened out or got tired of waiting on someone to respond to his demands.
Tags: dumb criminals, pain, Scannerland, Sheriff's Department, The Huntsville Times
Seriously, that is the most painful thing I’ve heard all day…